A streamer’s confes – 5 years of streaming

I posted something online on Youtube about the long term effects of online gambling, and in particular the streamers. Your up and you have to perform or produce “results” in order to keep your stream going. One came out of the closet in a honest way and i appreciate the response and actually confirmed on what i already knew.

I streamed for 5 years from 2016-2021 and it was everyday non-stop. I disagreed to all the casinos promos as it was all fake and i couldn’t stand it so i played as me with my spare money and viewers would donate and “help” here and there making me able to gamble everyday. Since it required alot of support to finance all that i ended up playing 24/7 streaming non stop it was just my life. But when roobet and stake entered the gambling world they nuked the whole player base and rinsed everyone with new gambling tactics focusing on making players enjoy wagering large amounts which is ridiculous at the core. But it killed it all so i stopped.

But even now, i played so much. Saw so much, i went up six digits at peak it was another world but it was… sick.. sad.. horrible. All the things i saw and heard of, that i would prefer to forget. All the fraud going on online, all the lies… the scale of it all. I try to do something else with my life by my psychiatrist said it himself.. i can’t completly quit, not now… it became all my life, all i am… it would kill me. But i don’t… want to play. I am not trying to win or have any kind of dreams. Streaming.. years of that.. and the end with roobet/stake… it ruined it all for life.. This is not gambling, this is something else. Too much scripted Ai’s work and manipulation it is sickening.

I am the consequence of it all… What does it do to play too much of this? It ruins your life, your brain, your body… your chemicals inside, your balance, your everything. You become a broken empty human. I dont enjoy nothing anymore. It’s life drinking top wines for years then go back to normal. The good wine was, an illusion, all that is served in reality is cheap scrap wine (comparison with online gambling services today). My body is addicted, my mind misses something that was never real… everything in me craves something that doesnt exist and i know it but i cannot explain that to my body. The damage is done at the core. I am considered a “beyond repairs” person.

I am starting to see a new therapist in a few days, try to talk about the streaming, my life… all i saw. I already did all that before, i used to gamble in real life before online and had therapies… i had a past all streamers have their story none is clean and virgin lol. I watch netflix, i run around. I am disabled for life. I already was for work a few years back thats when i started streaming to spend time. I tought it would fill up time it was suggested by friends online it wasn’t my idea. I never knew.. without spending a dollar… i would destroy my life so much. Hiroshima.. everything is dead and destroyed, no more family, money and greed turned everyone around me into monsters when i went six digits up. Thats when i stopped. I tried.. but something else inside of me.. something the casinos created… is not willing to stop. It knows it wont hit.. win.. or even have fun.. it knows it will get rekt like the everyday other days for past 2 years. It knows all is dead.. online gambling is dead… but it still wants it.. ask for it.. and now that my life is completly empty… what do i do? I dont know… All i can tell is i am addicted, i want to play everyday but i dont know why. Its automatic… the streamer life… running it like a job… it changed everything.. but when the job ended… my body.. my brain.. they werent willing to end. Thats the thing… That no one talks about..

If you want to stream, think about the above before you even begin.

Jordan Peterson on gambling

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